Trying Again

Isaac and I have decided that we're going to try again to have another baby. I stopped using birth control a few weeks ago. I'm currently 4 days past ovulation. I was reading an awesome list of things to do to make time pass during the tww (two week wait) and blogging was one of them. I already do this so I thought I would give a little sunshine to this otherwise dreary blog.

I have never been more nervous to try to conceive a baby. All I can think about is what could go wrong. Well that's not all I can think but it's close to the top of the list. Another thing weighing on my mind is, what if I get pregnant with twins again? Can I really raise twins and a toddler? Do I have the strength to keep up with a wonderfully energetic toddler and two newborns who will somehow both need my undivided attention? To say I'm freaking out over what could happen is an understatement. However, I know that I am a great mother and I know that I will somehow rise to the challenge if we are blessed to conceive twins again. Auggie and Pax will be my guides through this trying to conceive journey. I know they want nothing more than for me to be happy. I just can't help but feel like people will think I'm trying to replace my little angels if they knew we are trying again so we have made the decision not to tell anyone except my best friend Taylor and the secret internet groups I belong to.

On a brighter note, I'm already taking my prenatal vitamins and my doctor told me to take a baby aspirin everyday to hopefully help with blood flow and that could potentially help a new baby grow adequately. I will probably test in about 8-10 days or so unless my period returns before I get the chance. If anyone is reading this, be happy, you will be one of the first to know of my happy news whenever the time comes :)